


Saw You From The Other Side

by cecilia095



Category: New Girl
Genre: Alternate Universe, Blind Date, F/M, Online Dating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-28
Updated: 2015-12-28
Packaged: 2018-05-09 23:12:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,655
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5559341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cecilia095/pseuds/cecilia095
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The scary thing is, Jess is ten times prettier than she is online, and Nick is just ten times more nervous. <b>AU.</b></p>
            </blockquote>





	Saw You From The Other Side

**Author's Note:**

> The longest fic I've written yet - YAY milestones!, amIright? 
> 
> ANYWAY, this happened, and I hope you all like it. xx

"A dating app? You're out of your mind, Schmidty, I don't even own a  _smartphone_."

"Which is why -," Schmidt starts, and  _no_ , God,  _no_ , put your phone back in your pocket, Schmidt. "- I made you an account."

"No you didn't, I don't have an account,  _you_ have an account," Nick says defensively, refusing to look at the phone Schmidt is shoving in his face.

" _I'm_ engaged - to someone far too beautiful for a freakin'  _dating app_ ," Schmidt brags.

He is, though. Schmidt's fiancée is the kind of girl Nick would go for if he wasn't -  _well_ , Nick - but he is so he's always just kind of admired how beautiful girls like Cece are from afar, and he's accepted that he'd probably never get a Cece, or even a step below a Cece, and... whatever.

Now Nick is kind of curious about the girls on this thing, and he grabs the phone from Schmidt's hands, swiping through the app. "You weren't kidding. Schmidt, these are  _college girls_ ," he says, wrinkling his nose in disgust. Two, three years ago? College girls were cool, easy to bring home, easy to get out of the house in the morning with some mundane excuse. Now? Nick isn't so sure he's into dating a twenty-something who hasn't learned how to handle a beer yet.

"Wait, isn't that who you want?", laughs Schmidt, and Nick just shakes his head and says, "Not really. No."

"Nicholas Miller, you do  _not_ want to settle down. All the women your age on this app do. I'm pretty sure one thirty-year-old had just the baby bottle Emoji as her profile description. She either wants to start procreating like,  _right now_ , or she's looking for a stand-in. Do you want to be a Baby Daddy, Nicholas?"

"What? No. Come on, there's gotta be somebody decent on here."

Schmidt laughs and hovers over Nick's shoulder. "Did you see your profile, though?" he asks, and Nick is all, "What the hell did you do?" He taps on his own profile - custom-made by Schmidt,  _thank-you-very-much_ , and cringes at Schmidt's choice of profile picture. "I'm in a button-down and I'm  _smiling_. When the hell did you take this, Schmidt?"

"Last Hanukkah. You look handsome! I love that shirt on you."

"Don't call me ' _handsome_ ' right now, man. I'm furious at you."

"That smile says, ' _Make me your Baby Daddy_ ', Nicholas. It's a good smile!"

Nick scans his profile once more and slaps Schmidt in the arm after he reads the description Schmidt wrote. "' _I like feminism and long talks in coffee shops_ '? Dude!"

"You're not a feminist, Nick? I'm disappointed. More disappointed than that time you showed up to my work dinner in  _flip flops_."

"No, not that, it's just - I hate coffee. Remember that one time you ordered me coffee?"

"You spit it into a napkin like a _dumb little_ _boy_ , and then you obnoxiously raised your hand for the waitress to come take it away, and then me and Cece and Winston died of embarrassment and made you take a cab home."

"What if she asks me to go to a coffee shop, Schmidt? Erase it!" Nick frantically waves the phone at Schmidt's face, and Schmidt's just kind of snickering.

"Who is ' _she_ ', Nick? You haven't looked at a single profile."

"Well then I will!" He focuses on the phone screen and begins swiping - left, left, left,  _left_. "Sorry," he apologizes when Schmidt says, "JUST PICK ONE, DAMMIT!" 

"Whoa." Nick's eyes bug out a little bit, and he lets his finger hover by the screen. "Jess Day. Thirty-one. She's a teacher and she has a Hemingway quote in her description."

"And she also has  _terrible_ fashion sense," Schmidt says, shaking his head as he takes a look at the phone screen. "I mean, blue and green polka dots? Swipe right, and then message her and just say, ' _My friend Schmidt wants to dress you_ _._ '"

"I'm not saying, ' _My friend Schmidt wants to dress you_ ', you idiot."

"Fine, then say: ' _If my friend Schmidt weren't happily engaged, he'd want to_ undress _you and put you in something else, because those polka dots are_ killing him _._ '"

Nick ignores Schmidt and swipes right, and then kind of widens his eyes when the screen reads: 'IT'S A MATCH'. "Oh, hey, she swiped right too."

"Great. You can both bond over your never-improving fashion senses together. Schmidty? OUT."

—

 **Jess:** _Feminism and coffee shops, huh? I didn't get that from the picture, but then again, it's just a picture of you smiling real hard against the counter of a bar. Hi, I'm Jess. :)_

Nick freaks out and cracks his knuckles before even  _thinking_ about what to type back. He thinks about asking Schmidt, but A. Schmidt's going to bring up the polka dots again, B. Nick would be interrupting a  _very_ interesting round of sex. -  _Seriously_ , is he doing an  _accent_ right now?, and C. Nick kind of wants to do this on his own.

He looks at Jess's profile before typing his response. He gets a good three, four, five looks at her profile picture and finds himself smiling at how attractive she is; how pretty and sweet she looks from just a  _picture_.

 **Nick:**   _Douchey friend wrote that description for me. I actually hate coffee. Feminism I can deal with, because ladies are awesome. Hi Jess, you're appealing. I'm digging the polka dots._

You _'dig the polka dot_ _s_ '? You're ' _appealing_ '? ' _Ladies are awesome_ '? Nick cringes -  _hard_ \- at his choice of words and then realizes this chick is never going to message him back. He stands up from the dining room table and knocks on Schmidt's door, phone in hand, ready to say, 'Here, take your phone back, and delete my account, because I don't think I'm ever getting an answer from Blue And Green Polka Dot Girl.', but then the phone buzzes.

 **Jess:** _My douchey friend Sadie wrote my profile description too. I don't even read Hemingway. Thanks for the polka dot compliment. That one's all me. Since you don't like coffee, maybe we can avoid that when you take me out?_

Forward. Nick's back is sweating, and he takes Schmidt's phone into his hands, carefully thinking about what to write back. He sits back down at the dining room table, hunched over the phone, and he just writes: 

 **Nick:** _Maybe this is too much because we've spoken a total of about twenty words to each other, but let me take you out tomorrow. Artie's Cafe. Is that by you?_

Jess replies a minute later with first a smiley face, then a, ' _Letting you, and yes, I'm a block down_ ', and Nick races to Schmidt's bedroom door, twisting it open.

"Schmidty, it worked, I literally got her to go out with me after two -  _Oh_ , you're both  _super_ naked. Gross."

Nick covers his eyes and Cece rolls off of Schmidt, the two of them sitting up with just a sheet over them. 

"Wait, for real? Did you tell her you were a cancer patient who had just days to live and she decided to take you up on your offer because she loves charity?"

Cece whacks Schmidt on the arm. "Come on. Nick is a good guy. Who wouldn't say yes to a date with him?"

Schmidt laughs. "Um,  _you_ , several times. Do you remember how much 2011-Nick hit on you?"

Cece cringes. "An awkwardly uncomfortable amount, but we're past it, right Nick?"

Nick salutes Cece and says, "Absolutely. Not weird at all. Anyway, I'm taking her to Artie's."

"Did you come in here to ask me to borrow money or something? I mean, Artie's isn't too pricy but you're  _Nick_ , so."

"Schmidt!" Again, Cece whacks her fiancé on the arm and says, "He came in here because he was excited to tell you about the date."

"That too, but um, yeah, I kind of need to borrow like... forty bucks."

Cece smacks herself on the forehead and Schmidt just says, "Knew it. Cecelia, grab a hundred from my wallet. We're goin' big."

—

They talk a little bit more on the dating app because he's nervous and she's nervous. She tells him she's gone on one date via this app before, and it ended ugly; something about a comedy magician who pulled a  _hat_ out of a  _rabbit_ , and Nick says he doesn't want to know how  _that one_ ended.

It's 11:15 P.M. when Schmidt asks for his phone back, barges into Nick's room with a hand held out, the other on his hips. "God, you'd think you were  _in love_ or something. I need my phone. It's my alarm. Tell Polka Dots goodnight." 

Nick grunts and types a simple, ' _I'm heading to bed. I'm looking forward to tomorrow, Jess_.', and then Schmidt snatches the phone.

"She's gonna think I'm a loser," he says, and Schmidt just raises an eyebrow. "Who goes to bed at 11:15?"

"A man who has his business together, Nicholas, that's who. Are you nervous?"

"No way, man. ' _Am I nervous_ '? Ha-ha."

"You're sweating."

"It's hot in here, Schmidt."

"It's a comfortable sixty-eight degrees. You're nervous."

"Me? I don't get ' _nervous_ '," Nick says, air-quotes and all.

"The last woman you touched was  _Caroline_ ," Schmidt points out, and Nick just shudders at her name. Caroline is his ex-girlfriend who, he'd much rather not bring up, thank-you-very-much Schmidt. You know in cartoons, how one character is chasing another character, and the first character is running so fast until he reaches the edge of something - usually a cliff -, and then the character who was chasing him catches up and then it fades to black? That's Caroline and Nick, in a nutshell, and he just - He needs to  _not_ , okay?

"Was not," Nick argues. "I did over-the-bra stuff with that girl from the bar."

"The one who looked like she could've been a cast member of  _Glee_? That doesn't count."

Nick reaches over to his night table and turns off the lamp. "Get out of my room, Schmidt."

"Good luck tomorrow,  _sweetheart_."

"Don't call me ' _sweetheart_ ', I hate when you call me ' _sweetheart_ '."

"I mean it sweetheart. Polka Dot Girl could be the one."

—

He's early - and he's  _never_ early to things. Jess asked him if 1:00 was good, but he's there at 12:52 just in case, and at 12:54, Polka Dot Girl, in real life, rounds the corner. 

She's looking down, pocketing her phone into a red bag, and once she does that she takes a hand to her hair and starts playing with it, and from far away Nick notices her bangs are all parted - not like the picture -, and she's got the biggest blue eyes, and fuck, okay, Nick Miller does  _not_ believe in that whole 'Love at First Sight' crap, but  _damn_ , Polka Dot Girl could be the one.

Nick clears his throat and debates on walking right up to her and holding out his hand, but he doesn't. He lets her walk up and say, "I-I'm with - Is Nick Miller here?" and then a host points to the table Nick is already sitting at.

Nick stands up and blinks a few times. Polka Dot Girl in the flesh. The scary thing is, Jess is ten times prettier than she is online, and Nick is just ten times more nervous. He wipes his hands on his khakis - Yes, Schmidt made him wear  _khakis_ -, and makes sure they aren't sweaty before shaking Jess's. 

"Wow, um, so, I'm really - I'm really bad at these kinds of things," is the first thing she says to him, and  _thank you_ , Dating App Gods. 

"Y-Yeah, me too," he says, and then he holds out her chair for her and tells her to sit. 

"You're even prettier in person," he compliments, and he doesn't know if it's too much or whatever, but Jess blushes and ducks her head and mumbles a quiet, "Thank you. You too."

" _I'm_ prettier? I can't be. That picture was from Hanukkah 2014, and that's the best I'll ever look. I don't smile too often."

"Well... you should."

A waiter comes by and Nick orders them two waters - with lemon, because that's fancier than just water. He asks Jess if she wants anything else to drink. "I was gonna get myself a beer, but I didn't want to be rude."

"Not rude," she says, "but I don't - I'm not - I'm not very good with alcohol."

Nick chuckles. "No?"

"Pink wine," she whispers, "which I was  _about_ to order," again: she's whispering, "makes me slutty."

He widens his eyes and tries not to laugh. "I'm sorry?" 

"Pink wine makes me slutty. There, I said it, so if this ends up working out you know my deepest, darkest secret, and you know never to serve me pink wine in serious situations."

"I'll make a note of that," he jokes, and he flips his palm over and pretends he's writing on paper, using his other hand as the pen. "I'm not supposed to tell you my deepest, darkest secret now, am I?"

Jess shrugs, and she plays with a petal on one of the flowers in the vase at the center of the table. "As long as it isn't, ' _I once murdered somebody_ ', I can wait."

There's awkward silence for a second, and then Nick sets down the fork he's playing with. 

"Bad joke?" Jess asks.

"No, it was cute, I just didn't know how to answer."

"But you haven't murdered somebody?"

"What? God. No. Oh my God. Sometimes I threaten to murder my roommates, but I'm only half-kidding."

"So, your roommate, is he the one wrote your profile?" Jess asks after a few seconds.

Nick clears his throat and says, "Yeah, Schmidt, he's kind of a dick."

"How come?"

"He thinks he's better than everyone else because he's engaged to a hot model."

"Hey, that's kind of an accomplishment. Is she at least cool  _and_ hot, or just hot?"

"No, she's cool, she's really cool. So is he. They're just - You know how it is. You get to your thirties and you're  _here_ -" He flattens his hand on the tabletop, and then lifts his other hand up above it and says, "- and your friends are  _here_ , and suddenly you go to so many weddings you lose count, and none of them are yours."

Jess swallows. "I get that. I just got out of a pretty serious relationship."

Good to know. "How serious? Like. No. I'm sorry. What happened? Wait, no, you don't - You don't have to tell me, that was - I'm sorry."

She's laughing, and then the waiter comes and sets down two glasses of water with lemon and Nick says to give them a few more minutes to order. "Anything ya' want, honey," he says jokingly, and Jess nods, taking a sip of her water before saying anything.

"He cheated on me. Hard. Like, I'm talking, 'I walked into our house and another woman walked out of our bedroom' kind of cheating."

"How long ago was that?" Nick asks, blinking. 

"Um... long enough for me to not cry over it while I watch  _Dirty Dancing_ on loop."

"Oh, is that a thing you do?" 

"Kind of. Just... don't hurt me and you'll never have to deal with me leaving you ten-minute voicemails while I sob along to ' _The Time of My Life_ '."

Nick picks up his water glass and takes a sip, then says, "You got it."

—

"Okay, she's like, _perfect_."

Cece and Schmidt and Winston are all watching some ridiculous Lifetime movie when Nick gets in from his date, and each of them raise their eyebrows at him.

"Spill," says Cece, reaching over for the remote and pausing the TV. 

"She just -"

Schmidt raises a finger and says, "Sorry, man, but I'm gonna have to cut you off. Was she wearing polka dots?"

"Why does that  _matter_ , oh my  _God_ , she - No, she wasn't wearing polka dots, man, now shut up."

"Schmidt, if you don't stop talking about polka dots I will wear nothing but polka dot lingerie in bed for the next six months," Cece threatens, and Schmidt immediately stops talking.

"She tried to split half of the check with me -"

"Oh, I bet you tried to make her pay for the whole thing," Winston says. "You so  _cheap_ , man!"

Nick rolls his eyes. "I paid. Well, Schmidty paid. I owe ya', Schmidt. Anyway. Pink wine makes her slutty and she got cheated on by her ex-boyfriend of  _six years_ and she's seen  _Dirty Dancing_ like, seven-hundred times, and she's - Do you ever meet someone and kind of just know you're into it?"

Cece: "No."

Schmidt: "HEY!"

Cece: "I'm sorry, I absolutely  _hated_ you in 2011, Schmidt. You called my boobs 'party hats'."

Schmidt: "Fair. I was such a douche."

"Would you guys stop? Look, I like this girl, okay? I'm not saying she's Mrs. Nick Miller but I have to start somewhere, right?"

"Again: Start with telling her to change her profile picture. Now that we know she owns clothes that aren't polka dotted, it isn't too late."

"SIX MONTHS, SCHMIDT.  _SIX MONTHS_."

—

Their second date isn't a ' _date_ ', exactly. She drives to his loft and they sit outside in her car - old, beat up, blue station wagon, such a  _Jess_ car, and he barely knows her. Nick asks her if she wants to go somewhere, and she just shrugs and twists the keys out of the ignition, throwing them into the cupholder between the two front seats.

"I just wanted to see you, I guess," she says earnestly, and Nick is glad it's so dark because he's blushing. "I'm not big on getting to know people across the tables of crowded restaurants."

It's been two days since their first date at Artie's Cafe. 

Nick says, "I agree. I kind of hate first dates. And seconds, and thirds, and... I mean, all of them are really awkward, so..."

Jess is playing with her hands, and Nick wishes he knew her better and was able to tell whether or not he makes her nervous. 

"Have you ever met up with anyone else on that app?" Jess asks, and Nick widens his eyes, and then she waves her hands in defense. "I didn't mean it like  _that_ ," she says, and Nick is just laughing. "Obviously you're allowed to. Obviously this isn't  _a thing_ , yet," she says, pointing at the empty space between she and Nick. "I just - You're different from everyone else I swiped right on."

Romantic. (But true - he feels it, too). 

Nick honestly says, "I haven't. It's hard for me to get interested in people. If we're bein' honest, I kind of hate 'em. I mean, I've had the same three friends for like,  _ever_."

Jess laughs. "I wish I could make people stick around forever," she says, and Nick just swallows thickly, because he's ninety-nine percent sure she's referring to her cheating bastard of an ex-boyfriend, and he just wants to -  _Ugh_. 

"What - What are you looking for exactly?" 

"I mean..." He doesn't know how to answer her.

"Like, I want to be where everyone else in their thirties is," she admits, "but I don't want to rush it, either. I'm afraid if I rush it, it won't be as real."

Nick wants to reach out and squeeze her knee, but he also doesn't want to scare her off, so he just puts his hands in his lap and nods. "Sometimes I look at where my friends are at and wonder if that'll ever be me," he says. He's never said that out loud before. "Like my friend Schmidt, he and his fiancée, Cece, they spend all day hovered over bridal magazines and seating charts, and it seems boring but it's  _not_ , it's actually kind of nice. Sometimes my only task for the day is: 'Put on pants'."

"I forget to put on pants  _all the time_ ," Jess says, laughing. 

"Stop, because now I'm picturing it, and I obviously don't hate it."

Jess buries her face in her hands. "Stop! It's not cute. It involves unbrushed hair, big, oversized glasses, and probably a flannel I've been wearing for three days straight."

"Relatable," he says, and he says  _screw it_ and brings a hand to her knee, giving it a squeeze. "But I don't know, maybe we'll get there, you know?"

Jess nods slowly, and she's looking down at Nick's hand on her kneecap, but she doesn't move it or anything. "I know."

—

Their third date isn't a date, either. He brings her up to the loft because Cece and Schmidt are staying over at Cece's place for the night, and Winston's working down at the station.

She doesn't stay long though, because it's a Tuesday night and she's a teacher, but she comes up and sits on the couch with him and just  _talks_ , and it's kind of nice, whatever they have going on. 

It's 8:09 P.M. when Nick offers to walk Jess down to her car. 

"I got it," she says, waving a hand at him and standing up from the couch. "This was nice. Thank you, Nick."

A girl's never  _thanked him_ for bringing her upstairs before. Nick bites the inside of his cheek and says, "You're welcome. Are you sure I can't at least walk you out the door?"

It takes her a second, but she says, "I'd like that".

He lets the door of his apartment shut behind them and for a second he's just like,  _looking at_ _her_ ; looking at her beautiful, too-big blue eyes, and the way she's looking over at him is just - No one's looked at him like that in forever, but he tries not to dwell on it. She's biting her lip as Nick says, "Well, goodnight, Jess."

Jess nods. "Goodnight, Nick."

"Wait."

"What?"

"I just..." He's not good at this, at saying how he feels - or why he feels like if he doesn't kiss her right now it's all worthless -, so he just grabs her by the forearm and tugs her into him, and then he's  _kissing her_. Like, full-on, mouth-to-mouth, hand-in-her-hair, hand-on-her-waist,  _kissing her_. She blinks, but she's into it, and then a few seconds later she pulls her mouth off of his, exhaling. 

"Wow. Um."

"Don't say anything. I'm sorry."

"No, it's okay, I actually - I was waiting for you to do that."

—

 **Jess:** _I can't stop thinking about it._

Nick widens his eyes at the message and stares at the screen of his phone for a few seconds, until another one comes in.

 **Jess:** _The kiss, I mean. Wouldn't it have been awkward if I was like, "Your couch. I can't stop thinking about it." Nice leather, though._

 **Jess:**   _But seriously. I don't want to say you're the best kisser I've ever kissed because you might get cocky on me, but you might be up there._

—

Nick's list of people he can stand being around goes like this: **1\. Jess, 2. Everyone Else.**

Jess is the only person he thinks about. Every time something  _remotely_ notable happens, all he thinks is, ' _Damn, I can't wait to tell Jess_ ', and when she gets home from work, she keeps Nick on the phone for two, three hours telling him about her day from start to finish - and he doesn't even  _care_. He likes it.

One night, he thinks he might be able to fall in love with her, because he's laying in bed and he knows she's laying in hers, and they're up until three o'clock in the morning on the phone, laughing so loud Schmidt bangs on the wall and yells, "HANG UP THE PHONE, NICHOLAS, OR SO HELP ME GOD I'LL KILL YOU IN YOUR SLEEP, I WILL! EIGHT A.M. PRESENTATION! JESS WON'T HAVE A THREE A.M. PHONE BUDDY TOMORROW NIGHT! I'LL KILL YOU!"

They kiss every time they see each other. Seriously. One day she just stops by the loft for like, two minutes, because she bakes these insanely good cupcakes for the kids at school and figures he'd like them. He opens the door for her and she just hands him a little white box with a pink and silver bow on it. "There's some extras for your roommates in there," she says, and Nick just wrinkles his nose and leans out the door to kiss her. It's a thing. He just can't be around Jess and  _not_ kiss her. 

Schmidt points and laughs and says, "Oooooh", when Nick shuts the door. "Wittle Nick Miller is totally in love."

"Is  _not_ ," Nick says, rolling his eyes at his best friend. "I don't 'fall in love'."

"I think you  _will_ , though," Schmidt says, and Nick's a second away from throwing a cupcake at his face. "And I want a personal 'thank-you' from you to me in your wedding vows. I'm the one who made you an account on that app. Give me the credit I deserve."

—

They sleep together the tenth time they hangout.

It happens in Nick's bed, because Jess is currently crashing with her friends Sadie and Melissa - (Cheated on, broken up with, kicked out of the house she shared with the douche - it happens).

Jess is tight, and she just laughs it off and says, "Been awhile."

Nick tells her it's okay as he's hovering over her, pushing her bangs off of her forehead and pressing kisses along her hairline. He hasn't kissed a girl like this since Caroline. Everyone else it's just: Quick smooch here and there, lots of penetration, one or two more quick smooches, and then a quick lie to get them out of his bed.

He laughs and slips a condom on, and Jess lets out a moan when he enters her. He shushes her. "Sorry. My roommates. They're home."

Jess digs her fingernails into his shoulders, sustaining each moan as Nick thrusts inside of her. She takes his face in her hands and kisses him a few times, and then asks, "This wasn't too soon for you, was it?", and Nick just shakes his head 'no', kisses her fiercely to solidify that.

"Okay," she says, "good."

—

They're at Artie's Cafe, but this time Cece and Schmidt are across from them because it's about time they formally meet Jess - Not just as she's leaving Nick's bedroom in the mornings - and Schmidt kind of lives for double dates.

Schmidt's phone is facedown on the table when it buzzes, and Cece asks, "Is that the wedding planner?"

"It's actually..." Schmidt widens his eyes. "Nick, it's the dating app, you have a match."

Cece catches it before Nick or Schmidt do, trying to grab the phone out of her fiancé's hands, and Jess just kind of rubs her lips together and says, "The app, huh?"

"No, Jess, I don't even  _use it_ ," Nick says. "Thanks a lot, Schmidt."

"What? It buzzed!"

Jess stands up from the table and pushes her chair in, grabbing her purse and flinging it across her body. "I'm gonna go. I just don't feel like being here right now."

Nick stays sitting until Cece says, "Chase her out, moron!"

"Jess, wait!"

Jess turns to face Nick and just laughs, and he's confused. "No, it's my fault, Nick."

"Wait, what? You didn't do anything, Jess, but _to be fair_ , I didn't either. I didn't even know Schmidt still had the app downloaded to his phone."

"No, it's okay, I just - Even if you  _were_ using the app, what right do I have to get mad about it, you know? We're not - This is not - You know."

Nick pockets his hands and shakes his head. "Well do you... do you want it to be?"

"I don't know Nick, that's the thing. How do you know when you're ready for 'forever'?"

He sighs and asks if she wants to do this somewhere else; somewhere not in the middle of the lunch rush at Artie's Cafe.

She nods and they walk halfway down the block, stopping in front of one of the apartment buildings. 

"I really  _really_ like you," Jess says. "But I don't like how crazy I just got. Like, who am I to tell you not to talk to other women, you know? We just sleep together."

"We just - Whoa, okay, no, you think - You think we ' _just sleep together_ '?"

"I mean." She sighs. "I don't call you my boyfriend and you don't call me your girlfriend."

"Is that what you want, Jess? Like, should I ask you to be my girlfriend? Did I miss some sort of memo?"

"I shouldn't have to ask you to ask me to be your girlfriend, Nick, you should just... want to do it."

Okay. Wait. No. "Is this some sort of game?"

"Um. No."

Nick just says, "Okay..."

"Maybe we moved too fast," Jess says, and Nick doesn't get it - he doesn't get how everything can be  _so good_ and then  _so bad_ , and he's running a hand through his hair with a sigh, biting the inside of his cheek as he looks onto a frustrated Jess.

"And you want to stop?"

"I think so," is all she says.

—

"Nicholas, stop hopelessly looking at your phone and  _do something_. Like, I don't know, how about that dirty, disgusting pile of filth in your room you like to call 'Laundry'."

"It's been three days and I still haven't heard from Jess."

"Who cares? She confused the hell out of you  _and_ ran out on all three of us after I ordered her a very expensive dish of Penne alla Vodka. I'm still hurt."

"She didn't run out on  _you_ , Schmidt," Nick says with a grunt, taking his phone and pocketing it. "She ran out on me because she knows I don't know what I want."

"Nonsense. You were great to her, Nick," Schmidt says. "She probably ran out because she forgot to feed her birds. She looks like somebody who has birds."

Nick ignores him. "I don't want to be somebody who doesn't know what I want, man. I want Jess."

—

 **Jess:** _I think we were moving a little too fast_ _. I want my next something to be something big, but I'm not so sure you do._

—

 **Nick:** _Maybe I just liked you too much. That happens. I like people too much and then I don't know what to do after that._

 **Jess:**   _Save it, Nick_.

—

"I can't believe you invited Jess to your wedding."

Nick is  _pissed_ , and he wants to think it's a joke, but the seating cards are  _right there_ and there's, 'JESSICA DAY'. 

"She doesn't even know anyone who's going," Nick argues, and Cece just shrugs. 

"It was this one's idea, not mine," Cece says, pointing to Schmidt. "He likes her."

"That, and she promised to get us that saucepan on our registry a few weeks back, so."

"I don't want to see her there, man, okay? It's bad enough I have to go without a date, but that the girl I  _would've_ brought as my date will be there - without me."

—

A week goes by, and Nick curiously goes on the dating app. He looks for Jess's profile, which is still up - same picture, same Hemingway quote, all of it. He wonders if she's been talking to anyone else on here, but he closes it before he can look at the 'Last Seen On:' section of her profile, because then it'll feel a little too real, and he's not sure if he feels like being kicked in the ass again right now.

—

He gets super drunk the night of Schmidt's bachelor party. No, like, college days times ten drunk. The guys are all still being rowdy in the bar, and Nick is at one of the tables in the corner. Everyone has two heads right now. Reaching for his phone, he starts to type to Jess, because it's been two weeks and  _nothing_ , and Cece and Schmidt's wedding is three days from now and he's going to have to deal with all of this eventually.

 **Nick:** _I do want something big_.

She responds a minute later. It must be like, four, five A.M.

 **Jess:** _I don't think we were right for each other._

 **Nick:** _Why's that?_ _  
_

**Jess:** _I don't think we're looking for the same things._

Nick has way too much booze in him to keep a conversation going, so he just types:  _Maybe not._ , and Jess doesn't respond.

—

_One Day Later_

**Jess:** _I'm sorry if that was harsh. You're on my mind a lot, even if we didn't work out. I'll see you at the wedding_.

Nick pockets his phone and forgets to respond.

—

_Another Day Later_

"I think I'm over it," Nick says, almost defeated.

Winston sets his spoon down in his cereal and asks, "What happened?", mouth full.

"If I'm not right for her, I'm not right for her."

"You give up on stuff  _way_ too easily, man."

"Should I not? She made it very clear this whole thing wasn't gonna work."

Winston throws his hands up in defeat and says, "All I'm saying is you give up on stuff way too easily, and maybe you shouldn't, even if someone else does."

—

The day of Cece and Schmidt's wedding is here, and Nick almost forgets why he was so annoyed about going - (The Jess Thing, anyone?) - because so much more is happening. Schmidt's tie is two shades too light, Cece's trying not to cry her makeup off as a frantic Winston fixes her broken veil, Schmidt's very much divorced parents accidentally ended up next to each other at the ceremony... The list goes on, and Nick's in the middle of running around to find something called 'setting spray' so Cece's tears stop screwing up her mascara. 

"Nick?"

 _Of_ course.

"Hey Jess, not now, um, I'll - Hey, wait, what's 'setting spray' and where do I get some?"

Jess laughs. She's in a baby blue knee-length dress and she looks beautiful, obviously. "You mean this?" She pulls a tiny black spray bottle from her purse. "Is this for you?" she teases, handing it over to Nick.

"God, no, it's for Cece, she keeps crying because Winston accidentally broke her veil in half or something, I don't know, but you - Thank you."

"Anytime. I cry  _a lot_ during weddings, so I came prepared."

Nick claps his hands together. "I gotta - I gotta get this to Cece."

"Right. I'll um, I'll see you in there."

—

Everything, by whatever miracle, works: Schmidt's tie, Cece's veil, all of it. As the two exchange vows, everyone watching has to sustain their tears, even Nick. (They're  _really_ good).

He gulps when they kiss and finds himself looking for Jess in the audience of people, and when he finds her, she's looking at him too. It's embarrassing, and both of their cheeks kind of turn pink as they hastily look away from one another. 

At the reception, Nick gives his Best Man toast, with a little alteration. "Cece, Schmidt, I love you. I love you because you  _never gave up on each other_ ," he says, his words pronounced, and then he finds Jess, sitting at a table in the corner with people she probably just met.

"Cece, when you first met Schmidt, you had no idea, five years later, you'd be standing next to him on an altar, but you  _are_ , and things just - Sometimes things just happen even if they don't feel like they're supposed to."

"And Schmidt, you didn't always try your hardest for Cece. Sometimes you even gave up when neither of you knew exactly what you wanted." Again: He's grilling Jess, and she knows it, because she's visibly biting the inside of her cheeks and sucking her stomach in and playing with the utensils on the tabletop. 

"But you're here, today, married, and you're  _happy_ , right?" Nick lifts his champagne glass and turns to the bride and the groom, who both inch in for a quick smooch. "Sometimes, we don't know who we belong to, but we won't know until we try. TO CECE AND SCHMIDT!"

The crowd repeats, "TO CECE AND SCHMIDT!" 

—

"Hey dummy."

"Oh, hey, I didn't see you there."

"You  _literally_ walked over to my table. Are you drunk?"

"Huh? No. Sober as hell, unfortunately." Nick pivots around so he's facing Jess completely, holding his champagne glass up to his lips and slurping from it.

"Gross, stop slurping," she says, wrinkling her nose. "Nice speech."

"Wasn't it?"

"Not really. It felt very unrehearsed."

"I wrote it during the ceremony, so, yeah, it might've been."

"Look, Nick, I'm sorry, okay?"

Nick sets his champagne glass down on Jess's table. "For what?"

"Can we just... Do you want to dance?"

This slow, Schmidt-type-of-song is playing right now, and Jess is tugging at Nick's wrist, bringing him toward the dance floor. 

"I don't dance, Jess."

"For me?"

"You broke this whole thing off, so, I don't know, when you say ' _For me_?' all cute like that, it doesn't do much."

"You just called it 'cute', so I  _think_ it might," she says, smirking. She slips her fingers through his and walks them over toward the center of the dance floor, their hands intertwined.

It takes Nick a second to loosen up, but when he does, he doesn't seem to mind the way both of Jess's arms are draped over his shoulders, pulling him in closer as the music gets louder. 

"Nick, I haven't stopped thinking about you, you know."

"And you think I have?" He's being honest. "Jess, I don't always know what I want, that's true, but I want you."

"It's just - We met on a  _dating app_ , Nick! I don't know how serious you are about anything, and I mean, how can you trust me? I was on there too."

"Easy." He slips one of his hands in hers again and squeezes it. He's not a romantic, but he's trying. "Jess, you have crazy eyes."

"What? No I don't."

"You do, though," he says, laughing, and Jess just looks all offended and pouty. "I like them. If I had to look into one set of eyes for the rest of my life, I'd want them to be yours every time."

"You stole that from Schmidt's vows, Nick! Did you forget that I was there?"

"You're right, you're right, I did, my bad. It's the champagne."

Jess rolls her eyes and the song gets slower. After a few minutes of nothing but silence and dancing, she lets her head fall onto Nick's shoulder. "Mmm."

"' _Mmm_ '? What's ' _mmm_ '?"

"Why didn't you ask me to be your girlfriend? Dozens of dates and late night rendezvous later and nothing."

"Because I suck," he says quickly, and Jess laughs, but he says, "No, for real, I do. You know, I think I was scared of you."

"Of  _me_? I can barely open doors without struggling."

Nick slides an arm down the small of her back and tugs her into him, as if they weren't close enough before. 

"I'm scared of  _feelings_ , Jess. Do you know that - Okay, I suck at this, so stop me if I start to make you uncomfortable, or annoyed, or - Whatever."

"Try me."

"The first time we ever went out, I told my friends how perfect you were, and that I just knew. I think I was afraid of falling in love with you because I'm no good at it."

Jess narrows her eyes like she doesn't believe him, and then, sure enough, she says, "You weren't in love with me, Miller."

"I wasn't?" He snickers. "I was - and I think you were too, but you were just as scared."

"I'm not  _scared_."

"Yes you are," he says, and his other arm falls to the small of her back. "You're scared I'm gonna do what that douchebag did to you."

"Who wouldn't be?" Fair point.

"Jess, you're just, - If you let me have you, if you let me be with you, -" 

"What, Nick? Just say it."

"I don't think about anybody else. Ever."

"Yeah. Me too."


End file.
